Friday, September 10, 2010

oh lord....

so....i kinda abandoned my little ol' bloggie.  there were a million things going on in my life, kids, summertime, and well, i just put other things ahead of my blog.  someone mentioned it yesterday (thanks leen) and i thought to myself, 'self...' haha just kidding.  no, it reminded me how much i really love blogging and having it there to look back on.  i'm a sentimental mush lately and i need to fuel that fire.

oye.  i can't even begin to catch you up (you know, the 2 people who read this LOL)...
back in may, emma finally had her eye surgery.  we'd put it off for as long as we could and finally we had to have it done.  her 3d vision was starting to disappear (even with glasses) so dr. rahmani decided that it was better to have it done now while she was still young and we had the possiblity of the 3d vision coming back.  the surgery was hell.  she wouldn't open her eyes for 2 days, but the results have been phenomenal.  she still wears her glasses, but her prescription is a whole point less and she more or less wears them to strengthen her eye muscles that were moved.  i haven't seen her eye cross once since the surgery!  talk about a load off!  there's always the possibility that she will revert back to the eye crossing but as of now, we're calling the surgery a great success.  we are supposed to go back next week for a check up and i'm hoping we have even more good news!

other kid...other story lol
madelyn had her tonsils out (after just having her adenoids out in january) august 20th.  we're still in the healing process but i'm hopeful that things will finally be normal with her.  she's been so sick her whole life, i'm hoping this will make a difference.  she's already sleeping better at night (oh my god, i forgot what a whole night's sleep felt like!) and her breathing is much better too.

ummmm, me.  i'm a hot mess.  i can readily admit that.  i was in a pretty major accident.  i was being a nice girl, because you know i can't say no, and was working at the branch where i used to work before madelyn was born.  i got off work a few minutes early and was on my home to pick up the babes.  i was sitting at the stop light talking to my mil when some jackhole rearended me...going about 40.  $8000 damage later, i'm pretty much ok.  i'm in physical therapy for issues with my neck and shoulder and i'm hoping that that will take care of it.  he hired a lawyer to take care of all the insurance issues bc well, either Darik or I are any good with all that legal mumbo jumbo.   the other effects of this are just...well...my anxiety is back full swing.  i hate to drive, in fact, i hate to even leave the house.  i've done pretty much all i can to avoid doing anything i don't 'have' to do.  i realize i should call the doctor, i really do, but i keep telling myself that things will get better with time.  working is helping, but then i am SO sore the next day and that leads to me being upset and just, it's a nasty, vicious cycle.  i guess what i'm hoping is, it'll go away on it's own.  i've submerged myself in my little digiworld and that has helped me deal with stuff.  i have some of the best friends in the world...who i've never even met.  they pull me through this crap and they reassure me that i am in fact ok....and i love them for that.  they make me feel like i'm not some sort of freak...and unfortunately, all this crap is not something i feel comfortable sharing with anyone in real life.  i know certain people wouldn't judge me, but again, the anxiety...fear of rejection...it all comes rushing back when i even think about talking to someone about it.  anyway...enough serious stuff, i'm gonna make myself cry.

digiscrap wise...well...i am SO happy.  i have a ton of teams, yes, but i love them all.  right now i'm creating for fee jardine, darcy baldwin, penny springmann, meghan mullens, kristin cronin-barrow (i'm actually her lead eeeeeep), zoe pearn (i still wanna pee my pants over this one), jennifer fox (lead), sir scrapalot (lead), sugarplum papiere, laura banasiak, tracey howard and jaclyn bernardo.  i'm also guesting this month for lauren grier (guess all that pestering finally made her give in LOL).  i have a few freelance teams as well...litabell designs, geek chic scraps, and nikki epperson.  yes, my hands are full but like i've said before, this is my release.  i need to be doing something at all times....and this is something i love.

ok, my goal from here on out is to blog every day.  i know in reality it's not going to happen, but i'm definitely going to try to be better.  plus, this way my friends don't have to listen to me bitch and moan all the time...people can choose to read it if they want to LOL

until next time....

4 comments:

Jackie said...

totally loved reading your blog today - keep up the posting. :) hugs on the anxiety...i can only imagine! and keep those beautiful layouts coming - i love seeing them grace the galleries in digi-land!

ladybugs and lace said...

I love you Laura!!!

ladybugs and lace said...

I love you Laura!

Faye said...

*hugs hugs hugs* There is no shame in talking to someone or even taking meds for a time to help with the anxiety. It's such a horrible, crippling feeling, and it really lowers your quality of life. I adore you. I think you're doing amazingly well to stick it out this long. It's ok to need a little bit of help. I am SO glad to hear (and see in layouts!) how much better E's eye is, and I'm crossing my fingers so hard that this is that one last thing M needed to feel 100x better! Love you all so much!